Writing A Novel: More Excerpts From My New Manuscript

This is my 100th blog post at Naomi Rabinowitz Author! In honor of this milestone, I present to you two more excerpts from my latest manuscript. It's still a work in progress, but I'm pleased with how it's turning out.

In this first excerpt, the narrator, Sadie, is describing her rather colorful suitemates in her college dorm:

I lived in a dorm community called The Montgomery Cluster, which is made up of five three-story brick buildings: McGovern, Hastings, Dorchester, Adams and Montclair. McGovern is particularly popular with upper classmen because the dorms have suites. While most of the campus dorms consist of long hallways that have rooms on either side and one communal bathroom, McGovern's suites each have a small common area, a bathroom and three double rooms. The six suitemates share the kitchen and shower, and it's practically like living in an apartment.

If you and your suitemates are close, this is a great arrangement. You get a lot of privacy and have the chance to hang out in the common area as if you were a family. But if you don't like your suitemates, the set-up sucks because you're always in close quarters. In my case, I had to deal with the second scenario as most of my suitemates were well... eccentric.

Danica and Lori lived in the A room. At first, Danica seemed as if she were sweet; she always smiled and has big, brown eyes that twinkle with mischief. But the reason why she looks like this is because she was always laughing. Like a hyenna. I'm not exaggerating when I say that she cackled at everything. If you told her that you had a ton of homework, she'd crack up, her loud giggles echoing off the walls. Invite her to go to dinner and she'd let out a chuckle. Ask her if she can please keep quiet because it's 1 a.m. and you'd like to get some sleep and she'd launch into a full-out fit. I don't know what the deal is, but she laughed and laughed and laughed. I figured that she was permanently stoned, but her constant braying bored through my brain like an earwig on acid.

Lori looked like your typical beauty queen with big, brown curls and deep blue eyes. I think that she and Danica shared a stash, though, because while Danica was always laughing, Lori was constantly staring into space. Ask her if you can change the TV channel and she'd reply, "Whaaaa...?" Tell her that her phone is ringing and she'd say, "Huhhhhhh.....?" She was also a collector of clowns. Yes, clowns. One or two clown dolls wouldn't be a big deal since we all decorated our rooms with silly knickknacks. But she had about 50 clown puppets, clown figurines and a series of circus postcards. No one ever said anything to her about her, uh, colorful collection, but I can only imagine how much it messed with Danica's mind when she was under the influence. Maybe this is why she laughed so damn much, because she thought that she was at the Big Top watching a show.

Inez and Jill lived in the B room. Inez was a junior and was actually normal. She chose to live in a freshman suite because she was gearing up to become a residential advisor and thought that she could help out the rest of us. Unfortunately, she was hardly ever around. She knew pretty much everyone in the building and belonged to about a zillion clubs, so we only saw each other in passing. When she was home, she was like an oasis of calm among the rest of us.

Jill, on the other hand, liked to sleep all day. I don't know when she went to classes because she was always in bed. Surprisingly, she often had guys in said bed, though I'm not sure when she met them since she never left her room, at least during daylight hours. At night she came alive ... and paced our suite, back and forth, back and forth, for hours. I suppose that she was just a night owl or suffered from insomnia; then again, she might've been a vampire.

And then here, Sadie describes her eating binge:

Later I hid out in the back of the dorm's all-night cafe, a plate of cheese fries sitting in front of me and a pint of Ben & Jerry's Chunky Monkey faithfully cradled in my hand like a delicate vase. I sat facing the wall so that no one else could look at me or scrutinize what I was eating. Once I was sure that I was as alone as possible, I quickly scooped up spoonful after spoonful of the sweet, creamy treat, sighing as the ice cream melted on my tongue and numbed my throat. When I tired of the sugar, I grabbed a fry, letting the saltiness of the cheese warm my stomach. The more I ate, the more my brain shut down and I was able to forget about Veronica and her bloody artwork, or the fact that I hadn't connected with any of my other suitemates. For a few blissful moments, I could shut away my loneliness and concentrate on nothing but the ice cream's taste and texture. I slowly closed my eyes and licked my spoon, relishing the way the nuts crunched against my teeth and calmed my nerves. My suitemates were banished to the back of my mind.

For the past few days, most of my work has involved going through the first few chapters and rewriting certain parts. I keep meaning to move on to the next chapter and write that, but I'm not yet satisfied with my book's beginning. I'm getting there, though. I feel as if my characters are beginning to come alive and that their backstories are interesting. Once I have an appropriate build-up, I'll feel a lot more secure about getting to the next section. So I haven't progressed with my writing in a linear sense, but I've definitely improved upon my original draft.

I can't believe that I've already written 100 entries in this blog! A lot has happened in the past three months, most of it good. Hopefully by my 200th entry, I'll have much more of this manuscript completed.

Meantime, please read and review REVENGE OF A BAND GEEK GONE BAD.

Writing A Novel: Excerpt From My Latest Manuscript

The holiday season is always busy for me, and this year was a little crazier than usual since we threw a Chanukah party. Still, I've managed to get a lot of writing done and am now well into my latest novel. November, a.k.a. NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) went well for me and I plan for December to be equally as successful. I'd like to have my novel completed by April, though I also want it to be great. I'm not going to rush my work just to have it out by a certain time.

I'm feeling pretty confident about it, though it's my first draft. I have the characters and ideas down and just need to put everything on the page. Once I have my story's "skeleton," I'll edit through my work and add in the fine details that will help flesh out my characters and round out my book.

As an early holiday gift to you, I present a couple of excerpts from my latest work! Yes, it does have a title, but I'd rather not share it yet. I'd also prefer not to give away too many details. But for now, I will share that a) it's YA/New Adult and takes place during the narrator's freshman year at college b) It follows the story of a friendship between a straight girl, Sadie, and gay guy, Griffin c) The male lead is a track star and super-hot d) The girl plans to be a journalist and writes for her college's paper. e) The two leads attended high school together (Sequoia High, actually -- just like the gang in BAND GEEK!), but didn't hang with the same circles. And with that, here is the scene where she meets her soon-to-be-friend for the first time. Copyright Naomi Rabinowitz 2012:

It was no secret that Griffin was handsome -- he'd been voted "Best Looking" in Sequoia High's yearbook -- but I hadn't realized just how hot the guy was. He wore blue runner's shorts which fit perfectly across his tight butt and sculpted thighs. His wavy brown hair was slightly mussed from running, but fell in an adorable wind-blown swoop across his forehead. His dark eyes and chisled featured tensed with concentration as he stared out across the campus. And oh, yeah, he was shirtless. I guess he'd just finished a run because his well-muscled 6-foot-tall body shined with a coat of sweat. As he tilted his head back and took a sip from his water bottle, his bicep curled -- and my knees went weak. With the sun setting behind him, he looked like a statue that had been lit by God himself.

I continued to stare for a few more minutes, taken in by Griffin's beauty, when he finally turned and looked at me. I cleared my throat and straightened up, trying to pretend as if I hadn't been gaping at him like a lovesick groupie.

And here is the scene where Sadie describes her uh, eccentric artist roommate. Copyright Naomi Rabinowitz 2012

The evening that I had dinner with Griffin, I returned to our room to find her sitting cross-legged on her red-quilted bed, carefully working on one of her projects. Her purple hair was pulled back in a black headband and she wore nothing but a skimpy blue Sex Pistols T-shirt. Her forehead was creased in concentration as she moved something across a large piece of black cardboard. As I got closer, I saw that she had a cup full of toothbrushes next to her canvas. Nailed to the cardboard were dozens of them, lined up according to size and color. I recognized the pink brush on which I'd labeled my initials, "S.A."

"Um, hey, Veronica," I said, leaning over her bed. She looked up at me, her eyes blazing. "Uh, that pink toothbrush... it's mine, you know."

Her mouth opened then shut in protest. "Hruh!" she replied.

I sighed and rolled my eyes. "I'd like it back?"

"Nyuh!" (Translation: "No.")

I watched Veronica work for a moment, wondering how I could possibly reason with her; if she didn't want to talk, we could maybe play a game of Charades? But before I got a chance to suggest this, she reached into her dresser and pulled out a couple of tacks. She then pricked two of her fingers and sprinkled the blood over the toothbrushes. I blinked a few times, wondering if I was really seeing my roommate make a bloody Jackson Pollock.

"Hmmph!" she announced. She grinned at me and licked the blood from her fingers.

I grabbed my bag and headed for the door, leaving her alone with her "artwork." "It's okay," I said as I bolted from our room. "You can keep my toothbrush!"

Enjoy! Meantime, please read and review my novel REVENGE OF A BAND GEEK GONE BAD.

More Excerpts From REVENGE OF A BAND GEEK GONE BAD

Here are a couple more excerpts from BAND GEEK:

Josh offers to drive home Melinda for the first time and she's surprised by his car. FYI, my mother-in-law, Sharon, is an avid Star Trek fan, so his car decor is in her honor:

Josh led me across the parking lot to his car, which turned out to be an old, beat-up station wagon. Several bumper stickers were plastered onto the pea-green vehicle, including ones that said, "Honk if you love Tribbles!" and "I break for Spock."

"What?" Josh said, when he caught me chuckling. "This belonged to my Aunt Sharon. She really loves Star Trek."

"I'm sorry," I said. "This just isn't the type of car I expected you, of all people, to be driving. I thought you'd have something cooler, like a motorcycle." I tried to open the door to the passenger side but it wouldn't budge. He crawled across the driver's seat and pushed it open for me.

"It only opens from the inside," he explained. "But really," he went on, as he cleared a bunch of soda cans off my seat (none were Coke, I noticed). "What did you expect me to drive? I mean, I'm 16 and have hardly any money. I'm just glad my aunt was getting rid of this old thing."

"Well, you're lucky you have your license at all. My parents don't seem too anxious to teach me how to drive when I get my permit." Actually, they haven't wanted to discuss it at all. Whenever I bring up the idea of getting my permit, my mom will be like, "You don't need to drive. There are a lot of crazy people out there." I think she's so reluctant for me to get my license because she hardly drives herself, only on Long Island, but never in the city. But I love the idea of being able to get in a car and go wherever I want. I love the thought of being able to escape when I need to.

Josh turned on the engine and the car made a few choking sounds. "Get someone else to teach you to drive," he said. "It's not like your parents can make you do what they say forever."

"You don't know my parents," I sighed.

In this excerpt, Mel talks about her paintings. Fun fact: In college, I had several Dali posters in my room. I then invited over this guy I liked ... and he was horrified by the paintings. He thought that I was "sweet and nice" and was appalled that I liked Dali's out-there work. Needless to say, he and I didn't end up dating...:

For my last birthday, Lana gave me a professional painting kit, mainly because she thought I needed a hobby other than playing the flute. "It's perfect for you," she said as I opened her gift. "It's artsy and it's the type of thing you can do for hours without having to talk to anyone."

At the time, I'd jokingly told her to shut up, that I'm not that much of a shut-in, but she is right about me loving the arts. Before my dad started working such long hours and my mom began to take care of my grandfather, they'd take me to the city to see concerts and visit the museums. My favorite was the Metropolitan Museum of Art. The Met is huge; it took us all day to go through about a quarter of it, but I loved how every time we entered a different wing, it felt as if we were going into a new world.

As for my own paintings, I've been on a Salvador Dali kick lately. After Lana gave me her present, I purchased a bunch of art books so I could see what various painters' styles are like. I really like Dali's. His stuff is really strange; for instance, he has this one painting called "The Persistence Of Memory" that has all of these melted clocks in it. I love how his stuff looks like one thing at first and if you keep looking at it, you see something else.

So I've been trying to do some Dali-like paintings myself. Right now, I'm working on one where I'm making everything in my room appear melt-y. I was in the middle of painting a melted version of my bed (which is harder than it looks because the cover is floral and I had to make all the flowers look distorted) when I heard someone come home. I looked at my clock (which isn't melted, by the way); it was 9 p.m.

Please read and review REVENGE OF A BAND GEEK GONE BAD, now only 99 cents!

Excerpts From My Novel

I've spent a lot of time writing about the story behind REVENGE OF A BAND GEEK GONE BAD, but haven't shared too much about what's actually inside my book. In order to whet your appetite, here are a couple of excerpts:

Introduction of Josh

Josh is a junior and is pretty cute with his shaggy, light-brown hair and deep blue eyes. But the feature that stands out -— at least to his many female admirers —- is the lopsided grin he flashes whenever something amuses him.

When it comes to Josh, though, he thinks everything is a joke. He's a musical prodigy and plays trumpet even better than Mr. Francis does, but insists on sitting last chair. If our conductor forces him to audition, Josh will purposely make mistakes. He claims that it's because he doesn't believe in the auditioning process, but I think he just enjoys getting a rise out of Mr. Francis.

Meantime, Josh shows about the same amount of respect in the rest of his classes. Though he aced his PSATs and gets straight A's without studying, he often skips classes. When he is there, he's always pulling pranks on his teachers. One time he brought a lawn chair to math, then plopped down in it holding a beer as if he were at the beach (he got a week's suspension for that). Another time he locked his English sub out of the room when she was clueless enough to step outside (that only got him a week's detention). Last year, he even got us a day off from school. When workers began fixing the roof, several students complained about the fumes but the school refused to let us go home. So what did Josh do? He alerted the media about our "plight." Not wanting to look bad, Principal Muller was forced to let us stay home until the roof was fixed. Needless to say, Josh became the school's hero. Now he's never without a girl on his arm and gets invited to the jocks' parties, even though he's not on any sports teams.

Introduction of Mel's best friend, Lana

Lana Brody and I have known each other since kindergarten when her family moved in across the street from mine. But that's about all we have in common. While I've always been quiet and studious, Lana's more outgoing. She's not afraid to go up to guys at the diner and tell them she thinks they're cute or to do something funny like dance on top of a table at a party. When we were younger, my parents loved it when she'd come to our holiday dinners (since she's Jewish, we always have her over for Christmas) because while I preferred to watch all of the action, she'd chat with all of their grown-up friends. "Why can't you be more like Lana?" my mom would ask me after everyone else had gone home and we were cleaning up the dishes. "All you have to do is talk to people like she does and they'll like you."

My parents don't understand that some people are just born friendly, like Lana. She has this way of making everyone notice her, whereas I always seem to say the wrong thing or even worse, can't think of anything to say at all. This is why everyone likes her and I’m basically invisible. Sometimes I worry that the only thing that keeps us friends is the proximity of our houses, but so far, she hasn't ditched me for the cooler crowd.

Please read and review my novel REVENGE OF A BAND GEEK GONE BAD.